Bobby Gephart had not planned to go to church this Sunday – not to the service where the pastor intended to confess the oppressive secret she had kept for so long.
But she quickly changed her mind, realizing that she could not trust the pastor – the man she said had sexually harassed her as a teenager – to share the whole truth.
Gephart hurried to New Life Christian Church and World Outreach in Warsaw, Indiana, arriving in the middle of the service, and made sure her story was told.
Nearly one million viewers witnessed what happened next in this May 22 confrontation, videotaped and posted on Facebook.
John B. Lowe II, the congregation’s longtime pastor, confessed on stage in an “adultery” 20 years earlier. “I was wrong,” he said, admitting that he had never admitted it publicly “to defend himself.”
Bobby and her husband, Nate Gephart, who were watching from the congregation, then took the stage and picked up the microphone.
“If you love us, please let us talk,” Nate said, handing the microphone to his wife.
She said she was 27, not 20, that she had lived in prison out of lies and shame.
“For years I thought I was a terrible person, I had suicidal thoughts, I didn’t realize what had really happened to me, that I was a victim,” she told him. “I was only 16 when you took my virginity to the floor in your office. Do you remember this? I know you’re doing it. “
She told Lowe, “You kept me in jail,” but “I’m not a prisoner anymore.”
Bobby Gephart, now 43, told the Associated Press that he wanted the church community to know the truth and had no idea that a video recorded by a family member in the congregation would provoke such a viral response. She has received “tremendous support,” she said.
“I didn’t realize how much it helped and would help people,” she said. People “not only in this area, but all over the world are turning to me. Their stories are so heartbreaking. ”
Lowe resigned as pastor, the church said in a statement on May 23. The church said none of the staff had known about what had happened before and offered to help Gefart with “healing in any way we can.”
At a church service on May 29, Lowe’s son, associate pastor Brian Lowe, read a statement saying the church would be restructured and meet with members.
Indiana State Police said in a statement that anyone with “information as a victim or witness” about the situation should contact investigators.
Bobby Gephart said she spoke to police, but acknowledged that Lowe’s prosecution may be unlikely due to time lapse and because Indiana law sets the age of sexual consent at 16. She said she was aware of other past abuses in the church.
She said Lowe began getting a “haircut” – in which a sexual predator earns the victim’s trust through services and other means – before he turns 16. The sexual relationship continued in her early 20s. Lowe, now 65, was more than 20 years her senior.
Gefart said that since she was young, her family’s life “revolved around the church and Lowes.”
“We were like a family with them,” she said, and when one set of parents traveled, the other often looked after the children.
She said several people in the church knew what had happened, but it remained a secret for most of the congregation and no one helped her get advice. She said she felt obligated to protect the reputation of the pastor and the church and did not even tell her husband.
Things changed recently when her brother told her he was haunted by memories of his teenage years. She said he remembered seeing “his pastor in bed with his younger sister, a T-shirt and underwear.”
When she told him what had happened, she said her brother immediately confronted Lowe through a message urging him to resign.
She said Lowe began talking to some in the church, confessing to infidelity but not telling the whole story.
The church formed an advisory committee, which said in a later statement that the investigation had not been completed, could not verify the accuracy of Lowe’s version and advised him not to make confessions on May 22.
The age of consent varies between 16 and 18 years in the United States.
Proponents of the victims say such sexual activity by the clergy is beyond “adultery,” which implies agreement between equals. This is said to be an abuse of power by a spiritual authority. Some denominations, such as the Catholic Church, define sexual violence by the clergy as including any victim under the age of 18.
New Life is an independent church.
After Bobby Geffart confronted Lowe during the service, Nate Geffart tossed a necklace that Lowe gave to Bobby on the podium, followed by her “ring of covenant purity,” which many churches gave to young people to promote virginity before marriage.
“We work through love and forgiveness,” Nate said. “But people need to be held accountable, and they can’t just fool people and say, ‘Well, I just cheated.’ It was far beyond adultery. So, here is the ring of purity of the covenant back. I don’t want him at home. “
Some of the congregation expressed support for the couple and questioned Lowe, who admitted that Bobby was 16 when the sexual intercourse began. Later, some walked around him in prayer.
___
Religious coverage of the Associated Press is supported by AP’s collaboration with The Conversation US, funded by Lilly Endowment Inc. AP is solely responsible for this content.
Add Comment